school

so i am sitting in class not paying attention like always, when i decided to look at the masters programs for political science at emu. it seems very interesting to me and i may be able to do it. my cumulative gpa right now is 2.54. but that is with an e on my record. once the semester is over, i hope to have that e turn to an a. i started looking at my classes for next semester and beyond and became greatly excited. i will probably take one class over the spring/summer semesters at wcc, which will be my first class at a community college. it will only be online though, and the cost is about 70 per credit hour plus like another 21 bucks plus some taxes. so i am looking at under 500 ball park. which i think i could easily do. i also looked at what classes i still need, after this semester i can apply for the ug audit. hopefully i will get credit for some weird shit and will have to take less classes. that would be nice. basically i need 4 classes in my minor (public administration) a second english class which i will take at wcc, a speech class, a chemistry class, biology class, an art class and a physical education class. so basically 10 classes at 3 hrs a piece that is 30 hours. but ill take the one class this summer so it'll be 27 hours give or take a few. i am optimistic at this so woo for me.

a new job a new beginning

so this week i started at radio shack. i don't hate it but i don't love it. i get yelled at about offering the protection plan a certain way. i say do you want this, instead of we can cover this. whatever i don't have a problem getting it on stuff that should get it. but a 10 dollar sd card fuck that. it is rather boring though, there isnt always a steady flow of customers, so i must be alone with nascar nelson. so cheesy he is. we are forced to listen to jazz, while watching the speed channel, and listening to police scanners. in the 3 days i have listened to the scanners i have been rather upset. i don't think the general public should know the nature of a family's problems. i heard one thing today that someone was opening mail on another's porch who used to be their daughter-in-law. i find it almost disturbing how obsessed these people are for the scanners.
i also hate that i cant sit and talk to people for an hour about laptops or stuff i really know about. yea i do know some stuff, but like a guy wanted a tv from us, and although a good price it sucks. i want to just school him on all the benefits and stuff of it. i want to install his stuff too, maybe make some money on the side but i don't know if it is a conflict of interest chances are it is. but alls i would do is install routers, or look at their computers or set up their hdtv and stuff. ill look into it in the near future.
on another point, i worked at cabela's from 6am-10am came home slept for an hr and went and worked 12-8. it is money, and i am going to need this money in the near future.
my ebay business is slow, because i don't have the time to buy/sell like i did. and it is really sad because i really enjoyed doing that and still do.
i found it very funny, that i had to do a report on a memoir called 13 days by r.f. kenneddy. i literally only read 50 pages and got an a on the paper.

i also had an exam in my asian politics class and i can't understand the woman's english. i give her credit for trying but it is so hard to follow her. i spend my time writing powerpoints down. she sends tons of articles and tells us to read chapters. i have not read any of it and instead read wikipedia and well i got a b- on it and im happy because all the people studied so hard. i sometimes wonder my true potential if i cared enough or had the mental capacity to study for hours on end.

we'll see how the coming weeks go. i remain optimistic for things to shape up but who knows what will happen.

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an odd form of thinking

we all think in our own ways, in our own places. mine although can be classified as weird, (don't judge me) is the bathtub. i have taken baths over showers ever since i can remember. the showers happen occasionally, but lately i have taken to baths more often than not. i think of many things from what i am doing tomorrow to where i want to be in a few months from now. tonight's thoughts surrounded my starting of a new job tomorrow. i am anxious and can't remember ever being more worried or scared. i don't know why, but i know what is expected of me and i don't think i will be able to do that. there are certain things that i hate, that i can't stand in stores and that is a pushy sales associate. i will have to become that and if i do not will be forced to look for different employment in a few months. i don't want to be that guy. i want to talk to people and want them to buy what is needed and not what they should need. i've never been that great under types of pressure like that although my days in technology would say otherwise. i look oddly forward to seeing how this will pan out. but am worried that i will not make the cut.

i wish i had some money, like enough to have maybe a little debt but not at what i have now. there are many things i have been thinking of purchasing if i had the money to. one would be a broken macbook pro on ebay. why would i chose this? because i can get one for roughly have the cost, and if it is a hard drive failure that is only like a 100 dollar fix, same if it is just a broken screen. you can get a lot of good deals like that on ebay. i bought an old mac and am waiting on the part to fix it.

im excited for a new how i met your mother. it has been awhile since i have seen a new episode.

that is all for today
!2:10

appearances are misleading..

so i got the job at radio shack. am i happy about it absolutely not. i in some ways am forced to take this job. i know i should be thankful for having a job in this economy, but of course i am not. maybe it is my pessimistic views on life, or maybe it isn't. i feel like i have always been pessimistic no matter what situation is at hand. i am unsure at this point if that will ever change. or if i really want it to change. because when you start to think of everything as bad than you aren't let down when that happens. if you are always high on things being great, than it is a bigger let down.

i had to go home today to get a cat scan on my head. the reason being for this is that i get headaches on a daily basis, and no matter what i do they really don't go away. i am sure it is nothing, but what if it is? that in some ways scares me.

i'm still extremely stressed and i do not see a clear end in sight for that stress to discontinue. it really sucks, i wish things would shape up and that things would change and go back to what they used to be. but the reality of that is definitely uncertain and at this point does not seem to be able to occur.

i guess in other words i am just not happy. who knows

!2:10

The Return

I have come into some information today, that one of my favorite bands, blink 182 is coming back and better than ever. this band although not my all time favorite band, launched me into every band that i have listened to to this day in the punk/emo type genre. they have done wonders for me and have created a huge branch almost like a family tree for me and my listening tastes. i am so greatful that they are coming back and can't wait to see them in concert and listen to their new music.

in other news i have been watching a lot of movies lately, oscar time means a large quantity of dvd screeners. so far i have seen Gran torino, tropic thunder, religulous, milk, rachel getting married, the wrestler, doubt, and possibly more but i cannot think of them off the top of my head at this moment.

Gran Torino, was very well made and makes Eastwood stil llook like a bad ass, however his grunting is kind of weird.
Tropic Thunder was very stupid, but funny and i would like to see it again. Downey Jr. has come back!
Religulous was like a Michael Moore film, completely one-sided but still very informative and makes you think.
Milk was a film i might not normally see but glad that i have. i knew nothing about him, had i known more i would be able to make a better judgement
Rachel Getting Married, was another movie i might not normally see, but it was pretty decent and gave a good insight into what a family really is. i still am indifferent about it for some reason though.
The Wrestler was a decent movie given how much i've watched wrestling and read about it, it gave an accurate portrayal of people and what they will do to get back into the big time again.
Doubt was a decent movie but also left me with various questions. it was implied that he did it, but did he? makes the crowd wonder. and Streep well she played a good bitch!
taken was a decent movie, but i'll take a quote from Bowditch in that it was hard to see Nessan* as a bad ass. he just wasn't fit for that role.


that is all for now.
!2:10

three's

my mind is racing with thoughts. but when i go to put them in typing my mind thinks it is a different language. a lot has been on my mind lately. it seems that one thing has opened a pandora's box of sorts. it has made me think of repressed memories, and why i don't think about them.
i am worried about my niece. from what i gathered, she has some type of respiratory virus, it may be nothing but she is like 7 months old and i worry.
this is senseless rambling

!2:10

year and a half to go

so i have about a year and a half to go until i graduate with a bachelor's in poli sci and a minor in public administration. knowing i only have a year and a half is bittersweet. i will finally be able to possibly start a career. but i have no idea if i even want to get into that field. i do not want to switch majors because it would mean more schooling. and as student loans start to pile i am eager to finish. i have begun thinking if after i graduate will i move or not? i know i will not move closer to home if anything it would be further away. to where? i have no idea.

i am also fearful of the coming months, i have not received my official hiring in at cabela's and my seasonal leave started on the 27th. technically it doesn't end until the end of this month but i have not worked since the 26th.

i can make a decent amount of change from ebay auctions and what not but i do not know if it will be enough. it is very scary in some ways to not know when you will get another paycheck when u have rent and debt piling up as each minute passes.

in unrelated notes, did anyone see dick clark on nye? i found it almost painful to watch his count down, and felt that seacrest was a total douche. dick clark is a legend in his own mind and i have begun to agree with people that he should hang it up. it is extremely sad when you see a man who can barely talk correctly because of a stroke still try to do his job. i do however commend his work for the last whatever amount of years.

i also think it is time for joe pa to hang it up for the same amount of reasons. he is holding that school hostage.

!2:10